4/26/09

Wow...it was just one of those days


Wow...4 kids is a lot. Sometimes I just stop and think to myself, "I can't believe I am a mother of 4 kids!" How did this happen?? Don't get me wrong, I love being a mom and I really mean that. I really enjoy my kids. They are good kids and I love wathching them grow up. But, as you other moms know, some days are just hard to handle! I had two days in a row like that this past week. I was just drained physically and emotionally. Rick was gone both wednesday and thursday nights and when he came home thursday night I was ready to explode. I had just put the kids to bed and sat down to relax when he walked in. I was feeling very irritable and for some reason wanted to blame him...poor guy, he had done nothing wrong. Nevertheless, he was there and had to listen to me go off on how I had had two really hard days and that he couldn't poosible understand how hard some days are when you have to run kids all over, help with homework, give undivided attention (aka wrestling matches) to the "I need more attention" 3 year old, listen to the drama on the playground from my 7 year old daughter, remember to have the girls practice piano because the recital is saturday, come up with something for dinner, exercise, grocery shop, don't forget you have a 4 month old that does need to nurse every few hours, and remember that after dinner Rick is leaving to go to his softball game...I'm sure I left off 4-5 things I went off about. I really needed to vent and you should have seen the 'deer in the headlights' look on Rick's face. I knew that look. He didn't dare talk. I know exactly what he was thinking...,"please don't let her be trying to get me to miss my next softball game". I finally just said, "I'm not asking you to miss your sports games okay!! I just need you to listen!". He visibly relaxed and I continued.


I normally keep it all together really well. But, every now and then I start to lose it and this was one of those nights. In fact I even said, "you know, I keep it together 99% of the time"...and Rick replies, "...well, 95% of the time". Wrong time to speak up Richard.


Surprisingly enough, I didn't shed a tear during my little episode. I'm not much of a crier but now and then the tears will start flowing. This was more of a "I'm ready to fight not cry" moment for me. I think our conversation (he might call it something else) lasted about an hour...maybe more...it's all a blur now.


Now, I have to say that Rick is an awesome husband and all my friends know this. He does help me all the time and despite his busy schedule always makes time for me. I really wasn't needing anything from him but just a listening ear and a little sympathy...which I did end up getting. I felt a ton better the next day and the busy schedule continues but I failed to mention that my husband told me to stop trying to do too much and then mentioned all the "projects" I have been worrying about getting done including doing some yardwork, painting my table and my rocking chair, finishing my website, and about 3 other things I am working on. He told me to relax and none of that has to be done this week. He's right of course. Why didn't I think of that???

4/14/09

What happened to my sweet little boy?!?!?!






I have doted on him for 3 years now...my sweet little "can't do anything wrong in my eyes" little boy. I had 2 girls before he came along and I just couldn't get enough of the little guy!...

So now he is 3 1/2 and I just had another baby girl and want to know, where did my sweet boy go??? He is driving me crazy!!! He is aggravating the older girls all the time, having "accidents"...I like to call them "on purposes". He hates for me to be on the phone or computer or nursing the baby or doing anything but giving him all my attention. I know, I know, it is my fault for spoiling him with all my attention before...I couldn't help it though. He is just irresistible to me! I love how he always acts like a tough guy all day long and then wants his mommy to "give me 5 kissies and 5 huggies" or he can't go to sleep.

Two days ago he was misbehaving and I was getting fed up so I said, "You better straighten up little boy or you will be going to time out." To which he replied under his breath, "We'll see about dat...". I barely heard him and was so surprised that I started laughing and said, "What did you just say???" And he repeated it again louder but this time instead of scowling he was grinning from ear to ear.

At first I thought this was just a stage he was going through because of the new baby...thinking surely it will pass soon. Now I am realizing that this attitude is not going away on its own! So, I have decided I must take action. I consider myself a pretty good and tough disciplinarian with my kids and really they are great kids and obedient most of the time. So, today I started being more consistent with Neil about times outs (which he hates...that's good). I also realized that I need to spend more one on one time with him because he is actually needing that attention from me since I have been giving so much to the baby. Today we went outside and played on the playground then played basketball...all while Savannah was attached to me in her sling! Then later when Savannah was asleep we played "wrestling". He LOVES to play fight and I think its pretty fun myself. We did that for a while and it was so funny. He kept kissing his biceps and acting like he was going to rip my head off...but it's funny because he's not nearly as rough with me as he is with Rick when he wrestles him. By the way, he won the wrestling match. And guess what...he has been an angel all evening. I guess he just needs a little time each day alone with his mommy.