10/22/08

We refuse to get pets...should I feel guilty??

Our two oldest kids, 10 and 7 have been wanting a pet for a while now. They would love to have a dog but we shot that idea down real quick. Our excuse always being that we don’t have a fenced in yard and therefore can’t possibly get a dog until we get a home with a fenced in yard. (Our real reason was that we didn’t need another “kid” to take care of and we both can’t take the barking, smelling, etc. that comes with a new dog.) The girls have bought the excuse of not having a fence for a couple of years now but they are getting smarter and starting to wear us down. Nina, our 7 year old is starting to get impatient and is getting really pushy about the pet thing. We are starting to feel a little guilty and may be faltering in our position.

Now, to be fair to us parents let me say that we have tried a few small pets…

Auburn, our 10 year old, was 2 ½ and I was pregnant with Nina. A friend was getting rid of a pet “dwarf” bunny. It was so cute and TINY. She assured me it would stay as small as your hand. It was so cute the first month or so and Auburn and I really loved the cute little bundle…fast forward 2-3 months and our cute little bundle became this giant crazy rabbit (so much for the “dwarf” bunny). This thing was huge and would poop all over the place and leap on you…and the claws, the claws were killers! Auburn and I were both scared of the crazy giant rabbit and finally had to take it to the Humane Society. Sorry Thumper.

Our next brilliant idea was to get the girls fish…how hard can fish be?? Let me just say the 16 year old worker at pet smart isn’t the best person to get information from. So we buy a bunch of fish and a tank and all that good stuff. Things are going along just fine for a month or so. We notice the tank is looking pretty rough so we take the fish out, dump out 90% of all the water and fill it back up with our tap water. (Yes, this is what the 16 year old told us to do). We dump the fish back in and are proud of ourselves for finally cleaning the dumb tank. The next day I go in the girls’ room and the “sucker” fish (not sure about the official name, but the big guy who sucks on the side of the tank all day) is gone. Now, he is at least 3 times as big as any other fish in the tank. So, we are totally confused about where he is. He is not on the floor and definitely not in the tank. The other fish surely didn’t eat him. We finally give up the search and eventually go out and buy a new “sucker” fish. Well, the next time it’s time to clean the tank we do the same thing and the next morning the sucker fish is lying dead on the carpet. How that thing leapt out the back of the tank is beyond me. By now we realize maybe we aren’t cleaning the tank right. Someone, who is much more educated on fish than us, informs us (after laughing in our faces) that you can’t clean a tank that way….blah blah blah. So…eventually all the fish die and we end up getting rid of the tank (so glad to be done with that). And by the way, when we went to rearrange the girls’ bedroom we found the hard dead corpse of the first “sucker” fish. He had leapt out and flopped his way several feet under the girls’ bed…gross, I know. For the record, I had told my husband for weeks that there was a funny smell in the girls’ room but no one believed me.

So we have gone without any kind of pet for about 3-4 years. I’m not counting Nina’s pet caterpillar from Granny’s house named “porky” that died after a week. Nor am I counting “Sparks”, Nina’s pet ant that she had about a month ago and after several days she told me he liked her and wasn’t running from her any more and would let her pet his booty. Little did she know he was dying a slow painful death. The night he died she was so upset and crying (he was her pet for about 5 days…which was actually longer than I thought he would last). I felt so bad for her because they were real tears and she just loves animals so much. We buried his tiny shriveled up body in the ground in our back yard. She even made a paper headstone for him. Now, I am pregnant and sometimes do irrational things. I felt so bad for her I told her maybe we could get her a gerbil. (what was I thinking!) I figured, how bad can a little gerbil be?? She got all excited and I convinced my husband we could handle that. However, I have been hearing horror stories about smelly, escape artist gerbils. So, we told Nina we wouldn’t be getting the gerbil after all and are back on the idea of some more fish. I know, I know…put up a dumb fence and stick a dog in the back yard. Some days I’m tempted to do that.

The other day Rick and I were watching TV and saw some new toy that looks like a real pet tiger (Nina’s favorite animal in the whole world). It even makes noises and moves and cuddles with you. We both looked at each other with the same idea. Rick got on the internet the same day and calls to tell me the thing costs $60! At first I think, no way. But after about 30 seconds I think it is the best idea in the world. So, now we just have to stall until Christmas and get this “almost like real pet tiger”…and that should buy us another 6 months or so.

10/16/08

Going back to college...at 34.

So I had this great idea 1 ½ years ago that I would go back to college and finish my bachelors degree. Mind you, I was not done having kids when I decided to go back and finish. I just had this bright idea one day and then ran it by my husband, who is always very supportive…and actually he has always told me I should go back and get my degree.

So...I start back and after one week of school I am totally stressed out and freaking out about all the work involved (I’m only taking 2 classes at a time). I go to Rick and say I can’t handle this…I need to drop my classes…it was a terrible idea…(Unfortunately my husband is a very goal oriented person and now that he has me back in school he is determined for me to keep going.) So…he gives my argument no credit whatsoever and doesn’t let me quit. I pouted for a few days thinking it’s my life and I can quit if I want to and he doesn’t realize how hard being a stay-at-home-mom is…and then…half way through the semester I am thanking him for making me stick with it. And...we’ve gone through that same routine every semester. I love that man.

One thing I wasn’t expecting was that going back to college has made me feel so old! Around my friends and peers I’m feeling pretty good about myself…but these kids in college look like they are in high school. I’m like 16 years older than some of these kids! I’ve even gotten the “yes ma’am” treatment. I remember being in college and you always have that one “mom” in class that is going back to school after she’s had a few kids….un-huh, that’s me!

One good thing about being older is that I do so much better in school. I guess it’s all those extra years of life experience. I have made all A’s since being back in school and it does seem easier. Now, I must confess that my degree is an easy one…social work. I actually wanted to get my degree in psychology and become a family therapist. However, I found out from my college advisor that you can do the same thing with a social work degree and it is much easier to get into the masters program which is only 1 year. So, I switched and am happy with my decision. There are so many more options with social work. I would like to work with adolescence and young adults. I’ve also thought about being a marriage counselor. After my mom’s second divorce I went to therapy for about 2 years and it was the best thing I did for myself (I was 18 at the time). Since then, I've thought about becoming a therapist.

So, for all you mom’s who want to go back to school…I say go for it! It is hard and you get discouraged at times but it is very rewarding at the end of each semester. I want my degree so my kids will know it’s important to have an education…even if you end up never using it. I also want one just because I don’t want to feel like the loser without my degree among all my siblings (just kidding…sorta).

10/1/08

Way to go Mom...


Okay, so you have to understand my 7 year old daughter a little bit before I go into this story. Nina (nickname) is the middle child and she is a ball of fire. She says the funniest things and can be soooo sweet but let me tell you…she can try my patience like no other. I always tell my husband that God made her so cute so I wouldn’t kill her…that cute face is the only thing that has saved her on many occasions.

So, when my oldest daughter Auburn had to get glasses last spring, Nina was sooo jealous. She then wanted glasses so bad (did I mention she is a total pack rat and loves to collect any and everything). Anyway, she begins to ask, beg, plead for me to take her to get glasses. When I explain how things works she insists that she can’t see well at all and does indeed NEED glasses. I ignore her of course. So over the past 6-8 months she would bring it up every now and then and say she still needs glasses and can’t see and I would continue to ignore her…until last week.

Let me back up and say that Nina has had unexplained headaches for the past 2 years. (I know, I know, but it wasn’t as obvious back then as it is now) So last week she stayed home from school because of a bad headache and then she tells me, for the first time, that her head hurts AND her eyes hurt. That’s when I started asking her about her eyes a little more in depth. So, I finally take her to get an eye exam yesterday (you’d have thought she was going to Disney World). She couldn’t wipe the smile off her face…the only exception was when the “puff of air” went in her eye and she almost threw in the towel. Well, guess what? She not only needs glasses but her eyes are worse than Auburn’s!! “I told you Mom!”. So, after her exam she was deeply disappointed that she didn’t get the glasses on the spot and would have to wait a few days for them to be ready. Then she asks, “But Mom, what am I going to do until then? What about school and reading??” So I explain to her that she isn’t suddenly blind and that she will be just fine doing those things until her glasses come it. She also thinks that nobody will recognize her with glasses on…including her cousins and her siblings.

And I have to mention that when she did the initial sight test where you stand behind the line and cover one eye and try to read the letters on the far wall, she was saying she couldn’t see a thing except the top letter “E”. The second row was 2 letters and they were huge and yet she just couldn’t seem to make them out. The lady giving the exam found that quite funny…I guess I was looking concerned and the lady mouths to me, “They aren’t THAT bad”.

So, Nina picked out her glasses frames, with my help of course and she picked out her glasses case (her favorite part of the whole trip). I’m sure her case is now full of rocks, shells, buttons or one of her other “collections”. She assures me it won’t get lost before the glasses actually make it to the house…we’ll see about that.